The LoSHFG
by DeejaVu
Summary: The Legion finally goes down. You'll never guess who the villains are. Ch. 2-You'll never guess who the rescuers are either.
1. Chapter 1

**A Day in the Life**

**A/N: YES. Finally, some humor to brighten up all the drama I keep writing...**

--

_0500: Pass the security lockout codes, hide in the west corridor of the north wing. Security bypasses, see field notes_

_0600: Infiltrate Legion quarters, north wing, fifth level, east and south corridors_

_0700: Make magical breakfasts for Legionnaires that make them fall in love with the creators!_

"Eee!!" A chorus of fangirl squeals resounded through the room. Day stood at the head of the room.

"Okay girls! I know most of you are excited, but don't forget your magic and your weapons! We might have to take out a few female rivals on the way!" A few fangirls growled. Day bobbed her head. "Everyone be ready at 0430!"

"It is 0430!" A random voice in the crowd called out. Day blinked and looked at her watch.

"Well...then...let's go!" The group of girls cheered and charged toward the Legion Tower, ready to make their fangirl dreams come true!

--

"Brainy, Brainy! We've got another attack coming!" Chameleon Boy tugged on the android's sleeve. Brainy looked at the security recordings.

"Dear Coluan Collective..." Brainy gasped. He immediately threw the Legion Tower into red alert, waking up the hundreds of Legionnaires who all seemed to be in the Tower at one time. "They're back! Main targets and canons, get to the bunkers immediately! Females and unpopulars, prepare for battle! This is a N Level attack!" Brainy, Cham, Kell, Lightning Lad, Bouncing Boy, and TimberWolf all dashed into the safe house. Battle cries and screams could be heard through the titanium doors.

"Wha...Why do they keep doing this?!" Cham finally burst out.

"They won't stop until they have every fandom under their heel. They've already taken down several traditional Japanese animatics. They won't stop until every fandom is under their iron thumb!" Lightning Lad said darkly. Cham shivered.

"Wait, why are us canons in here? We don't need any protection." TimberWolf grunted.

"There are a few who would stand between us and out significant others. Like Brainy. He's got possibly billions of fangirls. Yet his significant other in his previous programming was In-" Lightning Lad started.

"Fiction, all of it. My supposed significant other is Shrinking Violet, Dream Girl if you prefer old school." Brainy cut Lightning Lad off with a glare.

"What are you talking about?!" Kell demanded. Cham shrugged.

"I dunno. I guess about their girlfriends?"

"WE DON'T HAVE GIRLFRIENDS!" Everyone but Kell and Cham yelled.

"You will soon. Looks like we're being pushed back. They prepared far too well. They brought a few fanboys to take care of the girls, and unknown fangirls have taken out the unpopulars." Cham poked his security monitor. "We have about ten minutes." Cham's monitor shook and wriggled out of Cham's hands, falling to the floor with an ungraceful thump. An explosion made the screen shake more, revealing villains of every shape and size and color. The fangirls looked mildly surprised, but their battle squeals quickly knocked out the stronger of the villains. One villain in particular paled, tossing Tharok and the Empress in the way of oncoming fangirl attacks. He ducked into the Tower and off of the screen.

"We have to do something! I'm not willing to sit in here all day while our world is getting dominated out there!" Lightning Lad hit a fist on the wall, his scar glowing in the low lighted safe room.

"No. As soon as they see us, they'll know we're at our last defenses." Brainy reasoned.

"Of course, since we've already taken over, you might as well come out!" Loud unearthly giggles erupted from the security monitor, abandoned on the floor. A girl by the name of Roxy was winking particularly at Brainy. Day was looking around for Cham. A few more Brainy fangirls crowded the camera, eager to see where their favorite Legionnaire was hiding.

"EEEE!! HE'S IN THERE!! WHERE'S ALICIA!!" The girl named Alicia popped up and placed an hand onto the camera. The Legionnaires blinked, then found themselves outside, being crowded and glomped by fangirls.

"HEEEELP!!" The fangirls took on a formation, with Day in the lead.

"We are the Legion of Superhero Fangirls!" Day pointed at the few Legionnaires that were still awake. "We have taken your enemies down. We have taken your collegues down. And now, we will finish the job by taking you down. We are the LoSFG. Do not resist!" Their signature chorus of squealing rang out just after Day's monologue. The Legionnaires winced as they were soon glomped into unconsciousness.

--

The Legion has been taken down. The Legion universe is no longer safe.

Who can save this world from this overwhelming danger?!

--

A hooded figure knelt in the eaves of the remodeled Legion of Superhero Fangirls Tower. He fingered the dust before nodding and mumbling a few numbers to himself.

Perhaps...

Perhaps this is the savior of New Metropolis...

Or perhaps not.

--

**A/N: Gawd. Insomnia+SugarMass crack chaos. HOW DID I COME UP WITH THIS?!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Random inspiration, thanks to Psychotic Pyro Fairy for the idea. (And thanks to the reviewers!)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own LoSH, although I'm sure it wouldn't matter if I said I did because the greedy money hogs at 4Kids don't give a crap. '-_- I do own the fangirls(and boys) and their TRUE significant others.**

---

A hooded figure jotted down the numbers and, on stealthy feet, rushed back to his ship.

"Did you get the information, Sigma?" Another hooded figure appeared from the shadows.

"Haven't I told you a billion times to use our REAL names, James, not that craptastic code name!" The first hooded figure pulled his hood down and clapped twice to turn the lights on. He scratched the top of his blond-haired head and glared at James. James sheepishly pulled his hood off.

"But Sigma is so much cooler than Trevor." James whined.

"Is it, now?" Trevor rolled his eyes and glanced around the rather cramped ship. "I can't believe we traveled all the way to their world for this."

"Well, this is where they were last seen." A third boy, in street clothes of the 21st century, strode in. "I know for sure that my Alicia went straight for the one that looks like a werewolf. Did you get the information I asked you to get?"

"Yeah, but I don't know how dust and numbers are going to find our girlfriends, Mac." said Trevor. Mac chuckled and snatched the notepad from Trevor.

"That's why I'm the smart one around here, Trev. Lemme just......there. Found them." He said after a quick sketch of the entire city. Trevor and James peered over Mac's immaculate drawing.

"Holy crap, how'd you do that, Gamma?" Trevor glared at James for his comment.

"Intelligence is no object, James." Mac smirked.

---

_1800 hours, LoSHFG New Metropolis base_

"Hey, Day, we're missing a few guys." A very short girl with platinum blonde hair stared up at Day.

"Who?"

"We're missing Tharok, Karate Kid, and Drax." She said.

"Hmm. Tharok has turned himself in at Takron-Galtos out of fear of us, he'll be easy to retrieve. Karate Kid will be hard to find, send Dusk and Shadow, they're good at locating people. And Drax is still in the Phantom Zone. Go ask Mecha if she's done making that projector for it, I know Wind wanted him. Why are you here instead of with Bouncing Boy, Waves?" Waves shrugged.

"The cause is always first. And I would consider it an honor if you called me by my name, Kai." Waves said quietly. Day shook her head.

"If this ever ends, we can go back to our real names. But if they-who-must-never-be-mentioned ever find us, we can't let them figure out who is who."

"A little late for that, isn't it, Kai." A group of approximately fifty hooded figures stood in the fangirl base command center. The one who had spoken was shoved aside by a figure behind him, who swiped his hood off messily and shoved a hand towards Day, or, as she can now be recognized as, Kai.

"Hi! I'm Omicrom from the Legion of Ticked Off and-" James was immediately shoved aside by the first speaker, who calmly removed his hood and politely took Kai's hand and kissed it. She snatched it back irritatedly.

"I apologize for James here. He's a little overexcited about being with Betty again. I'm Trevor, leader of the League of Boyfriends who miss their superhero fangirl girlfriends, subsidiary of the Fangirl Boyfriend Squad. I know you are Kai, leader of the Legion of Superhero FanGirls, subsidiary group of the Vanguard of Megalomaniac Fangirls. We've come to claim out girlfriends back." Trevor said eloquently. Kai growled.

"Get out. None of u-"

"Trevor!" Waves ran out from behind Kai and leapt into Trevor's arms. Trevor knelt and held her close.

"Elle." He said with a warm smile. "I missed you."

"I missed you too!" She chirped, smiling wider than before.

"No!" Kai screamed. "She doesn't want you back, Trevor!" Elle looked back and dropped her nametag with the codename 'Waves' on it.

"He's no Bouncing Boy, Kai, but he's much better for me." The hooded boys behind Trevor and Elle all took off their hoods, save one, and began to swarm the base in search of their girlfriends.

---

_2000 hours LoSHFG New Metropolis base, corridor L_

Kai sobbed, collapsed at the end of the hallway. She held her hands to her face and tried unsuccessfully to keep them near her eyes. They ignored her efforts and spilled down her face anyways. All the heroes and villains were gone. All the fangirls were gone, back to the real world with their equally gone boyfriends.

Footsteps echoed down the hall and Kai tried to compose herself before the footsteps reached her.

"Don't bother, Kai. I know you were crying." The owner of the footsteps said.

"Go away, Tobias." Kai hissed.

"Wow, you must be really mad at me to call me that. Remember? I'm your biased Tobi?"

"I said go away." She said again, sniffling and rubbing her eyes. "I have to report to Ultra and wait for my next assignment." Tobias kneeled and sat next to Kai.

"It's over. We're not the only team sent out. They sent teams out to the Twilight girls, the Naruto girls, the Bleach girls, and all the others. And I doubt you're the only girl who's refusing to accept it. But you are the only girl who has a perfectly good Tobi to come back to, in real life. Please, Kai?"

She stared at him, confused.

"What?"

"I'm not leaving you."

"But-"

"No buts. You're my one in seven billion, Kai, and I want it to stay that way. So will you please come back with me?"

Kai just sat there. No reaction. Tobias looked at her intensly. She burst into tears again. Tobias shrank back, wondering what he said wrong. Then her loud crying became laughter. Kai leaned on his shoulder, still laughing.

"I missed you, Tobi. So, so much."

---

_The next day, Legion Tower, Conference Room 3_

Kai peered inside nervously.

"Go ahead." Tobias said encouragingly. She glanced back at Tobias.

Kai entered the conference room, grimacing. All the girls she'd formerly commanded, their boyfriends, many of the earshot and glomped Legionnaires they'd fought, and all the Legionnaires they'd kidnapped sat in neat rows.

"I'm here to annoounce that as of 0200 this morning, the Vanguard of Megalomaniac Fangirls was disbanded, along with all of its subsidiaries. The commanding officer, Ult-I mean, Zaria, apologizes for discomort caused by imprisonment and sincerely hopes you accept her apology. I also apologize, as do my force of fangirls. We no longer intend any harm, and instead will enjoy the Legion of Superheroes in moderation like normal fans."

Tobias walked up and squeezed Kai's hand with a smile. Kai smiled back weakly.

---

**A/N: Here's an explanation of a few things.**

**~Sigma, Gamma, and Omicrom- These are Greek letters that James made up as codenames for Trevor, Mac, and himself. He also used the rest of the Greek alphabet for many other unmentioned boyfriends, not inculding Tobias.**

**~Day, Waves, Dusk, Shadow, Mecha, and Wind- Codenames used by the fangirls. In each fangirl grouping(in this instance, superheroes), the same codenames are used, depending on area of specialty(Elementals, Sun/Moon Cycles, Non-Elementals, and Psychology)**


End file.
